I'm a little confused. Let me see if I have this straight.....
If you grow up in Hawaii, are raised by your grandparents, you're 'exotic' and 'different.' If you grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, you are the quintessential American story.
If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim. If you name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick.
If you graduate from Harvard law School, you are unstable.·If you attend five different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded.
If you spend three years as a community organizer, become the first black editor of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend twelve years as a constitutional law professor, spend eight years as a state senator representing a district with more than 750,000 people, become chairman of your state senate's Health and Human Services Committee, spend four years in the United States Senate representing a state of thirteen million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment, Public Works and Veterans Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.
If your total resume consists of local weatherman, four years on the city council and six years as the mayor of a town with fewer than 7,000 people, twenty months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive.
If you have been married to the same woman for nineteen years while raising two daughters, all within protestant churches, you're not a real Christian.
If you cheated on your first wife (with a rich heiress) and subsequently left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the following month, you're a Christian.
If you teach responsible, age-appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.
If, while governor, you staunchly advocate 'abstinence only,' and dismiss the instruction of all other sex education options in your state's school system, and then your unwed, teenage daughter becomes pregnant, you're very responsible.
If your wife is a Harvard-graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, who then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's.
If you're husband is nicknamed 'First Dude,' possesses at least one DWI conviction and no college education, didn't register to vote until age 25 and was once a member of a group advocating the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.